Hi all,
There are several reasons I haven’t been updating my newsletter as much as I should. I believe the biggest reason is the book I was, keyword was, working on consumed so much of time. I poured a lot of time and effort into trying to pull everything together, but I feel that in the end, it wasn’t meant to be.
I feel a lot of disappointment within myself, honestly. These past three weeks have been an uphill battle, and it has drained a lot of my energy. I was given the impossible task of authoring a book that had no intention of leaving the initial stages of development.
I was asked to think about the title, the cover, the structure of the book, and many other difficult tasks that would make any 20-something writer cower into a corner. These asks, as I later found out, were not for me to find solutions to. I should not have been doing the work of somebody else. I was forced to do and try many things that I had no previous concept of.
In many ways, I was used for my ability to write. I am glad I didn’t sign a contract with this individual as they are destructive. I was assuming a lot of the risk when it came to my career, reputation, and ability to continue future projects. I asked to take on more risk than the normal amount. This book could've either been a hit, selling off the shelves, or a total flop. All I knew was that whatever decision I made was going to have weight to it. Signing a contract to work with this person meant I was going to be stuck with my name at the bottom of the book for the rest of my life. These negative thoughts were my body’s way of telling me “No.”
My lawyers and I agreed that this wasn’t the right project for me. I wasn’t getting paid and the only path to success I pondered was if I found opportunity through the book’s release. I made a mental list in my head and quickly discovered that there were so many holes in this project—I needed to flee.
After a hectic three weeks, I bowed out. I don’t like to quit a project, but I did. In all of my sadness, there is hope and excitement. When I dropped out of the race, I asked aloud to my friends
“Okay, what’s next?”
TJL